Saturday, December 08, 2007

I miss youth group

Procrastinator's Link of the Day™: Since I've finally run out of procrastinating time myself, I can't write lengthy commentaries these days, but my last deadline is now a day away and after that I'm sure I'll be able to write something.

In the meantime, this news article is so twisted and bizarre, from the unbelievably asinine youth group to the overly anxious mother inexplicably calling the police, that it needs no further commentary on my part. I'll simply quote one of the juicier bits:

Ms. Metz said at the Nov. 29 Young Life meeting, after her son and two other boys were selected to take part in the skit, they were taken to a rest room by an older teen and given adult diapers, bibs and bonnets and directed to take their clothes off and put the diapers, bibs and bonnets on. Her son took off his pants, but kept on boxer undershorts, his shirt, shoes and socks.

The boys returned to the group, where they were asked to sit in the laps of three girls. The girls spoon-fed baby food to the boys and then gave them baby bottles filled with soda pop. The first boy to finish was the winner.

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Thursday, December 06, 2007

The New Christian Economics

Procrastinator's Link of the Day™: Meet Supply-Side Jesus, Al Franken's unholy re-interpretation of Jesus's teachings based on classical economics. (Hopefully the humour is still present without readers having to take a first-year economics course or immerse themselves in Christian conservative notions about politics and the economy.)

Unlike the almost anarchistic Jesus of the original four gospels, Franken's Jesus helps the poor by refusing to give them free handouts, relying on wealth trickling down through rampant consumerism, and eventually sailing to Rome to bceome a politician.

Speaking of trickle-down economics and first-year courses, here's some corrective medicine for students who've been misled to believe Adam Smith was the father of modern capitalism:

"To widen the market and to narrow the competition is always the interest of the dealers ... The proposal of any new law or regulation of commerce which comes from this order, ought always to be listened to with great precaution, and ought never to be adopted, till after having been long and carefully examined, not only with the most scrupulous, but with the most suspicious attention. It comes from an order of men, whose interest is never exactly the same with that of the public, who have generally an interest to deceive and even to oppress the public, and who accordingly have, upon many occasions, both deceived and oppressed it."

"What improves the circumstances of the greater part can never be regarded as an inconveniency to the whole. No society can surely be flourishing and happy, of which the far greater part of the members are poor and miserable."

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Wednesday, December 05, 2007

Indulgences are Making a Comeback

Procrastinator's Link of the Day™: Reserve your spot in heaven today.

There's limited space, the owners of this website warn, and you don't want to be stuck at the wrong end of a weeks-long lineup at the gates. For $13, you can purchase a unique heaven ID number, an early reservation, and a tourist's guide. I wonder how you're expected to take these items with you.

This is not a sponsored link.
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